A Thousand Splendid Suns (pg.199-256)

Characters:

1. Abdul Sharif: thin, small headed man, bulbous nose (204), brown hair, pock marks, owns men's clothing stores, had blood poisoning, speaks well of his wife, Tariq's bed-neighbor in the hospital

Vocab:

1. Dehati (222): a village girl (negative connotation implying that Mariam is stupid and savage because she grew up in the country rather than in the city)

Notes:

* Mariam and Rasheed take care of Laila. Rasheed pays for pink pills from the hospital that are supposed to help her get better and Mariam nurses her back to health. Laila mostly sleeps (although agitated sleep) for the first few weeks. Rasheed had found her in the rubble and dug her out. He had also "saved" some of her father's books.

* Laila suffers from periods of withdrawal and collapsing. Although she is physically recovering, she obviously still suffers from severe psychological damage and from hearing damage in her left ear.

• "But then some memory would rise, unbidden, and there would be stony silences or spells of churliness. Withdrawals and collapses. Wan looks. Nightmares and sudden attacks of grief. Retching." (202)
• Laila: "I shouldn't even be here. My father wanted to take out the boxes. The books. He said they were too heavy for me. But I wouldn't let him. I was so eager. I should have been the one inside the house when it happened." (202)
• feelings of guilt and regret, like she was to blame for her father's death and could have prevented it.
• Mariam and Laila have the feeling of guilt over the loss of their parents in common. Both feel responsibility for what happened and their deaths. Mariam can relate to her feeling of pain and guilt in a way.

* A man, Abdul Sharif, comes to visit Laila and tells her that he had been admitted to a hospital and had met Tariq there. He tells her that Tariq had been in an ambush three weeks before he had met him, and was one of the only 3 survivors.

• Tariq had been burned badly, had his other leg amputated and had many other internal injuries. Very serious.
• Abdul tells Laila that they spoke a lot, and Tariq spoke mostly of her. Made Abdul promise to find Laila when he went to Kabul and to tell her that he loves her and misses her.
• Abdul informs her that Tariq ended up dying in the hospital.
• "Laila wasn't listening anymore. She was remembering the day the man from Panjshir had come to deliver the news of Ahmad's and Noor's deaths. She remembered Babi, white-faced, slumping on the couch, and Mammy, her hand flying to her mouth when she heard. Laila had watched Mammy come undone that day and it had scared her, but she hadn't felt any true sorrow. [...] Was this her penalty, then, her punishment for being aloof to her own mother's suffering?" (210)
• Laila again blames this suffering on herself and feels as if she is being punished for her past actions. Unlike her mother, she does not wail or cry, but recedes deep into her mind and finds a place of safety and happiness. She suppresses her emotions and thoughts about has happened.

* Mariam feels a kind of jealousy towards Laila because Rasheed treats her much better and goes out of his way to come off as a gentleman for her.

• He acts interested in her opinion and thoughts, while he tells Mariam to shut up.
• "It wasn't so much what he said, the blatant lies, the contrived empathy, or even the fact that he had not raised a hand to her, Mariam, since he had dug the girl out from under those bricks. It was the staged delivery. Like a performance. An attempt on his part, both sly and pathetic, to impress. To charm. And suddenly Mariam knew her suspicions were right [...] what she was witnessing was nothing less than a courtship." (213)
• The reason for the special treatment is that he is interested in Laila, and trying to take advantage of her situation in order to incorporate her into his household. He was nice to Mariam at first as well. Mariam is smart enough to realize this (perceptive).

* Mariam is very upset about Rasheed wanting to take Laila as a second wife

• Mariam: "Eighteen years, and I never asked you for a thing. Not one thing. I'm asking now. [...] I am too old. Too old for you to do this to me. For you, after all these years, to make me an ambagh." (215)
• He makes her feel guilty by talking about all of the horrible things that would happen to Laila if she were to just leave, implying that it would be Mariam's fault if such things did happen. He completely disregards her wishes, and basically tells her that he will take her as second wife whether Mariam likes it or not.
• Rasheed: "I knew you wouldn't take this well. I don't really blame you. But this is for the best. You'll see. Think of it this way, Mariam. I am giving you help around the house and her a sanctuary. A home and a husband. [...] In fact, this is...Well, I'd say this is downright charitable of me. The way I see it, I deserve a medal." (216)
• Rasheed is narcissitic and manipulative.

* Laila accepts Rasheed's "proposal," and the following day her brings her a ring that he bought with money that he received from trading in Mariam's wedding ring. (disrespectful)

• One of the main reasons for her acceptance is that she realizes she is pregnant with Tariq's child. --> If she accepts the proposal, Rasheed will be seen as the father and there will be less shame and less difficulties for her and her future child.
• She has no feelings for him, and is actually disgusted by Rasheed.
• Laila is resourceful and does what she feels is the best option for her and her child. Willing to put her child's happiness and well being before her own. There is now no reason for her to leave either now everyone she was ever close to has died.
• "She knew what she was doing was dishonorable. Dishonorable, disingenuous, and shameful. And spectacularly unfair to Mariam. But even though the baby inside her was no bigger than a mulberry, Laila already saw the sacrifices a mother had to make. Virtue was only the first." (219)
• She is only 14 --> very difficult decision for any woman to make, much less someone that age. She is courageous and strong willed.
• She goes so far as to cut herself after consummating the marriage in order to maintain the authenticity of her virginity. (intelligent an thorough)

* Mariam and Laila kind of avoid one another. There is an awkward tension between the two.

* Rasheed disrespects and belittles Mariam while putting Laila on a platform. He calls her a harami as well and pushes where he know it hurts her the most. Does not help the tension between the two women, and makes Mariam even angrier.

• Also tells Laila to ask Mariam if she needs anything, and insures her that Mariam will do it. --> Essentially makes Mariam into more of a slave/maid. Most definitely does not treat them equally as wives.
• Tells Laila that because he values her so much, and she is so beautiful, he does not want her to leave the house without him. If absolutely needs anything, Laila is to send Mariam to get it. --> Treats her better in a way, but is also more controlling of her. Doesn't just restrict her to a burqa when she leaves the home with him, but restricts her to the house unless he is with her (like a prison).
• Rasheed puts Mariam in control of watching over Laila when he is not around, and makes it clear that she is to tell him if she does anything that he deems "bad."

* Confrontation occurs between the women over what Rasheed said about Mariam doing the bidding of Laila.

• Mariam: "I won't be your servant. I won't. You may be the palace malika and me a dehati, but I won't take orders from you. You can complain to him and he can slit my throat, but I won't do it. Do you hear me? I won't be your servant." (225)
• Mariam: "I have no use for your company. I don't want it. What I want is to be alone. You will leave me be, and I will return the favor. That's how we will get on. Those are the rules." (226)
• Despite the way Rasheed has treated her, Mariam still has self respect and is strong willed and somewhat hard headed. Although she cannot really stand up to Rasheed and enforce her will, she can stand up to another woman (an equal according to society). There is a jealous there, and she feels spiteful towards Laila. Her hate is apparent.
• Laila makes it obvious that she does not expect Mariam to be her servant, and that she feels bad about everything. She also thanks Mariam for taking care of her when she was hurt. She is noticeably hurt by what Mariam says to her, but obeys her orders.

* Laila feels very lonely and reminisces a lot about her past and happy times. The hostility that Mariam shows bothers her as well. She is unhappy, but pushes through.

• Like Mariam used to, Laila finds he burqa and the privacy it provides comforting in a way. However, it is not because she feels threatened by men and their stares. It is because she feels like she can hide the shame she feels for being in the situation she is in (her life) behind the burqa. If she sees anyone she used to know, she doesn't have to worry about them seeing her and the way in which a girl with such potential has become such a failure. (232)
• Mariam felt the burqa was a way to hide her shame from the world as well. They have more in common than Mariam would like to admit.

* Laila and Mariam have their 1st actual fight --> "Laila was still shocked at how easily she's come unhinged, but, the truth was, part of her had liked it, had liked how it felt to scream at Mariam, to curse her, to have a target at which to focus all her simmering anger, her grief. Laila wondered, with something like insight, if it wasn't the same for Mariam." (234)

• They are both miserable, and neither have outlets for their misery. Neither have a comrade to talk to about their troubles or ways in which to escape them (either momentarily or totally).

* Laila's baby (the father of which is really Tariq, although Rasheed is the supposed father) is born and it is a girl. Rasheed is, again, very angry that it is not a boy.

• He refuses to call the child by her name (Aziza), and calls it either "the baby" or "that thing". Rasheed complains about the child all of the time, and he and Laila argue a lot. He appeals to Mariam and ask for her help, which she does not give.

* Mariam's feelings for Laila begin to change

• "The strange thing was, that the girl's fall from grace ought to have pleased Mariam, brought her a sense of vindication. But it didn't. It didn't. To her surprise, Mariam found herself pitying the girl." (239)
• She can relate to the girl, and understands how it feels. Again, they have quite a bit in common.

* When Laila refuses to have sex with Rasheed, he goes after Mariam with his belt.

• "Over the years, Mariam had learned to harden herself against his scorn and reproach, his ridiculing and reprimanding. But this fear she had no control over. All these years and still she shivered with fright when he was like this, sneering, tightening the belt around his fist, the creaking of leather, the glint in his bloodshot eyes. It was the fear of the goat, released in the tiger's cage, when the tiger first looks up from its paws, begins to growl." (240)
• Laila grabs Rasheed to try to stop him when he goes to hit Mariam. She defends Mariam...for the first time. It marks a change in their relationship (Mariam and Laila)

* Laila's love for Aziza is what allows her to go on in life. She loves her daughter more than anything, and the fact that she is in part the product of Tariq (her true love) makes her love even stronger. She is very matronly, and takes very good care of the infant.

* Laila had been stealing a single bill from Rasheed's wallet once every week since Aziza was born. She is planning on running away in the spring, and is trying to save a thousand or more afghanis before she leaves. (247)

• She is strong willed, determined and courageous. She will not sit there idly and allow herself to be treated the way that Rasheed treats her, so she does something about it. Something that Mariam never did, probably due to the fear that she had for him and the outside world.

* Mariam gives Laila the baby cloths originally intended for her baby before she died (1st real act of kindness on Mariam's part)

• Shows the beginning of a developing bond between the two women.
• The gift spurs a conversation between the two --> Mariam basically thanks Laila for standing up for her when Rasheed came to beat her, and Laila compliments Mariam and subtly offers her friendship and a kind of truce (249) --> IMPORTANT EVENT < --
• "And for the first time, it was not and adversary's face Laila saw but a face of grievance unspoken, burdens gone unprotested, a destiny submitted to and endured." (249)
• "A look passed between them. And unguarded, knowing look. And in this fleeting, wordless exchange with Mariam, Laila knew that they were not enemies any longer." (250)
• From then on they do their chores together and are friends

* Mariam kind of becomes a joint mother/aunt to Aziza.

• "Mariam had never before been wanted like this. Love had never been declared to her so guilelessly, so unreservedly. Aziza made Mariam want to weep." (252)
• Her and Laila have opened a part in Mariam's heart that has been closed for so long, she didn't realize it was there. She becomes much happier with the companionship and the presence of the child in the house.
• "Her heart took flight. And she marveled at how, after all these years of rattling loose, she had found in this little creature the first true connection in her life of false, failed connections." (252)

* Dostum switched allegiance in Jan of 1994, and the fighting and danger increased substantially. Fear ruled the streets, and rape became common. Women were said to kill themlves out of fear of getting raped, and men killed wives who had been raped in the name of honor. (253)

• Rasheed barircades the house, and it becomes even more of a prison then before.

* Mariam tells Laila her life story, and in turn Laila tells her the truth about Aziza's father (Tariq) and her plan to escape from the grasp of Rasheed.

• "She had passed these years in a distant corner of her mind. A dry, barren field, out beyond wish and lament, beyond dream and disillusionment. There, the future did not matter. And the past held only this wisdom: that love was a damaging mistake, and its accomplice, hope, a treacherous illusion. And whenever those twin poisonous flowers began to sprout in the parched land of that field, Mariam uprooted them. She uprooted them and ditched them before they took hold. But somehow, over these last months, Laila and Aziza--a harami like herself, as it turned out--had become extensions of her, and now, without them, the life that Mariam had tolerated for so long suddenly seemed intolerable." (256)
• Before, she basically shut her mind of to the world around her and resigned herself to simply going through the motions until death eventually came. Mariam has been awakened to life and happiness, and is no longer content living such a dismal life. For the first time in a long time, she feels hope.

Observations/Overview:

A lot happens in the house of Rasheed in this section, and the atmosphere of the house transforms significantly. It becomes more obvious how little consideration Rasheed has for Mariam and their relationship when he basically tells her that he is taking Laila on as a second wife. He completely disregards her feelings regarding the matter, which is not surprising considering that is what he does in pretty much every other situation as well. The incorporation of Laila into the family is problematic in a number of ways for Mariam. For one, it is shameful. Not necessarily according to society, but it implies that she is not good enough for her husband, and therefore he needs someone else who is better. Any woman, or person for that matter, would feel unappreciated and insignificant in such a situation. This becomes exaggerated by the dichotomy between how Rasheed treats Laila and how he treats Mariam. He continuously puts Mariam down and insults her while treating Laila like a queen. Mariam is basically ordered to act as Laila's servant. Fortunately Laila is not the type of person who would take advantage of Rasheed's offer. Mariam is obviously very angry about the incorporation of the young girl into the family, but she feels she cannot do anything about it. As such, she essentially tries to avoid Laila and exert what little power she has in the house. Mariam does this by setting rules regarding what she will do and what Laila will do around the house. In the beginning of the section, Mariam becomes more and more bitter and angrier. She is very mean to Laila, even though she really had no control over her fate either. For the first time, she has an outlet for her anger and she takes advantage of it by berating Laila and being hurtful. Laila takes it quite well, although she most definitely feels lonely, hurt and depressed in the environment of the house. She feels bad for Mariam and for imposing on her life by accepting Rasheed's hand in marriage. However, she was looking out for the life of her child when she made the decision, and it is the most important thing in her life. Laila has literally lost every person that she has ever loved, so she really has no other reason to leave either. Rasheed has provided her with an opportunity to live in a home and to escape the streets. So, her decision is in many ways the best for herself as well, or it can at least be seen that way. Before her child is born, Laila is very unhappy and feels shame in the situation that she has landed in. Her father told her that she could be anything and that she has all the potential in the world, and she has become the second wife of an old and abusive man. Although Mariam is imprisoned in the house, Laila is held under an even stronger form of oppression due to her beauty and youth. The is made worse by the fact that before the death of her parents she was essentially free to do what she wanted, and Rasheed restricts her to the house and a burqa when she is with him. Laila is still young, and she has a strong soul that has not yet been beat down by Rasheed. She tries to look at the positive rather than the negative. She is an intelligent, resourceful, strong and hard headed young woman. After the birth of Aziza, Laila is transformed. She becomes much happier and focuses the majority of her attention on her child. She worries a lot and takes extra caution to ensure that nothing happens to her baby, her only connection to the past and Tariq. Despite Rasheed's distaste for the female child, Laila is happy. She stands up to Rasheed, something that Mariam really could never do, and makes sure that she gets everything she feels she needs for her child. The addition of the child does not bring happiness to Mariams life at first. In fact, it only serves t make her more envious of Laila.

The atmosphere in the house goes through huge change once again after Laila attempts to defend Mariam from Rasheed's violent advances. Never before has Mariam had another person attempt to stand up for her, and it touches her. This is the begining of a new relationship between Mariam and Laila. As a token of appreciation, Mariam presents Laila with the female baby clothes that she had sewed for her own child before its death. The two women quickly become close and join forces in the house. They laugh and work together. Aziza quickly becomes incorporated into Mariam's life, and the addition of the two opens Mariam to new emotions. For the first time in a long time, she remembers how it feels to love and be loved in return. Her heart opens, and the bitterness that she once felt towards Laila is replaced by a feeling of companionship. They use each other to get through the hardships that they must face in Rasheed's home and under his rule. Mariam gains strength and resolve with the help of Laila. It also becomes very clear just how little confidence she Mariam has. At one point, she says to Aziza, "Why have you pinned your little heart to an old, ugly hag like me? Huh? I am nobody, don't you see? A dehati. What have I got to give you (252)." Never before has Mariam been in an environment that has allowed her to develop self confidence. Her mother tore her down as a child, she was unwanted and sent away by her father, and Rasheed continued to devalue her throughout their marriage. This could in part explain her lack of resolve when it comes to sticking up for herself in the past. Laila, however, grew up in an environment that encouraged her to develop her mind and her father consistently reminded her of her value as a person and member of the female sex.

Despite the difference in their upbringings, Laila and Mariam have a lot in common. Both are brought to Rasheed in terrible circumstances after the death of their family. Both women feel guilt and blame themselves for the death of the members of their family. Both feel shame about the situation that they have landed in, and both find comfort in the burqa's ability to hide them from the outside world and others. Neither Mariam nor Laila have any sort of feelings for Rasheed, and both are extremely unhappy under his rule. Both tend to search within themselves to find a form of happiness or a safe place removed from the reality in which they live. Although Mariam has essentially given up hope of finding happiness, she used to be much more positive. Mariam was much more like Laila at her age (14), but circumstances have hardened her and stolen her hope. Because of these similarities, they are able to relate to one another and understand one another better than many women would be able to. The culminating point in the development of their newly founded relationship occurs when Mariam tells Laila her life story (something she has never done with anyone before), and in return Laila tells Mariam about her intentions to leave Rasheed and Kabul and the secret regarding the origins of Aziza.